FT Chronicle

Just a couple of months right now, I’ve checked some of the papers in the cabinet out of curiosity. I, looking for something to do that rainy morning, hoped that I would find something about my childhood memoirs. Instead, I found this old notebook, an organizer, and as I read each page, I realized that it was my mom’s. it served as her diary and as I continue, I discovered my mother as a lively woman of her age. I have gone to the pages where her close friends are listed accompanied by a faded photograph of them smiling, the part where she told her stories of love and also of failure. I found myself creating a whole new figure out of the one I thought that I know about her.

I am never been close to my father, I never was. I am like more comfortable with her. My mother, Christina, whoever may have say, is the best mother that I would ever have in the whole world. She is loving, understanding, patient, what more can you say about mothers? She left her job the moment she gave life to me to commit herself into a more important duty: to be a committed mother. She nurtured us when we’re little, she endured those days making sure that we learned every lesson of life. I am not what I am now without her being my lamp.

I remember the times when she tells anecdotes of the days we were younger. How I see her eyes twinkle and her face becomes more radiant every time she reminisces those days. I can’t help myself but to listen and be amused.

I remember the times when she is joyful whenever I bring home accomplishments and awards. She appreciates very much giving her rewards for those years she up brought us. She is the reason why I keep myself on pushing what I’ve got. Every medal and certificate I bag are always for her.

I remember the times when she gives us advice or the sermons every parent will utter. I regret those times that I am ignorant and immature. I am foolish to shout at her and do not realize that I’m actually hurting her.

I broke into tears, letting it down onto my face when I crossed at the page that marked November 6, 1989. I sought myself for a ball point pen and wrote down: “Two years from now, I will be born. Thanks to you, I love always. I’m sorry for everything I’ve done wrong. I love you Mama, I’ll always do.”

I remember one day, her body broke down and she needs to be admitted to a hospital.  My mom is our all-around manager of the house. She’s the one who budgets the money wisely, who takes care of our things, and who gives us tender-loving caress. You know, it may not be what we call an accomplishment but, hey, living a life having someone there to bother your stuff makes my days hard without her. But, interestingly, I live through all of that days and nights all by myself.

I learned to rise early at the morning without someone to wake me up.

I learned to separate colored shirts from the white ones before doing laundry on them.

I learned to turn off the iron the moment I’ll be already done ironing the clothes.

I learned to rinse the dishes twice so that there is no soap left intact.

I learned to measure the water level using my index finger before cooking the rice.

But I never learned anything at all.

I don’t know why my mom keeps on smiling.

I don’t know why my mom never seems to look tired.

I don’t know why my mom knows almost everything.

Until that one intimate mother-son conversation, I remember her saying, “Do you know why I am not complaining? Do you know why I am the one who takes of your clothes, of your food, of everything you are? It does not matter whether it’s tiresome or not. It is the least I can do for you being your mother. It is because I love you.”

I broke down in tears. And there, I said to myself that I will study hard, that is the least I can do for her. I replied to her, “Don’t you worry, mom. All your sacrifices will bear fruits. I won’t let you down.” it is because I love her.

I wish I could have given her more than just plain appreciation. My love for her as a son is not enough compared to her love for the three of us. Now, I live the days to pay back to her not as a sign of gratitude but as a sign of an everlasting love. I don’t want to be a burden to her but be a man she wants me to be and the one she will be proud of.

I learned to pray a lot more.

I learned that I need to live a week without my mom to realize that she will never be there for us for always.

I learned to love her even more.

-Mothers’ Day falls on the month of May, coincidentally; her birthday falls on the same month. Mama, happy Mothers’ Day and Happy Birthday to you. Happy Mothers’ day to all mothers around the Globe!

There I was sitting in a stone, only contended of watching her flicker in light.  I’m in awe because of her unparalleled elegance where every moment makes me need her more than o ever had. I never knew that the day I thought would never come will mark its date in the calendar. There’s a battle between my heart and my mind and my heart was declared the victor. I can’t believe that there will be a sequel to my solitary love story.

This love is like an indelible ink which stained in my heart as opposed to the ephemeral butterflies in my chest. Sometimes I find myself in reverie, insinuated to hold your hands and to feel your embrace. Now you know all of the things I have inside, all the songs that I have sung and all of the poems I have written.

I can’t believe that I can go along with you home every time the darkness bites. My nights were supposed to be starless nights without the moon with the good old man singing in tune of melancholy. But your radiant glow overtook the light any star can burn.

Your impeccable beauty is the fairest among them all. Your smile brightens my day and pacifies my worries and anxiety. Beatific you are, oh, blessed maiden. Heed to my song of the nightingales. Your infallible gestures exemplify the demure woman of all ages. Your ethereal charm never withers but never fails to enfeeble me, a thing I cannot elude.

Your fragrant scent rivals the spring’s flowers. Your sweet voice is like harmony from the birds. Your crystal eyes shine like pearl. You have that enchanting and provocative smile that revealed very beautiful teeth. You also have that fair face with seductive and attractive eyes. And your lips, oh, they are as tender as the budding flower. I see the dawn in the East with beauty endowed.

Every time you pass me by, heaven makes a beautiful view. I found ways of you quite irresistible which my heart grows fonder for. And there I was, singing at the top of my lungs saying all I have kept for years. All of these words flew from my mouth making myself be astonished for what I have done. Centuries I’ve been waiting for that right moment, and that moment finally came.

I once found her walking in the garden of Eden. She’s a delicate handiwork, an angel certainly! She’s on top of every splendor I see. Her smile is engaging; her face is serene. She seems to emanate an air of tranquility; she possesses an ethereal ambiance. She’s sculpted with grace, a masterpiece of the Golden Era. Whatever may come or whatever may happen, she will always be my divinity in my eternal Earth.

Define love.

Love is blind. Love is stupid. Love hurts. Love is all that matters, faithful and forever…

These are the popular answers that fill up the top question in slumbooks.

What is love?

People keep on saying they do not want to love anymore. They are afraid to be hurt again, to be broken-hearted. They do not want to be sad, to be lonely. They do not want to have mixed emotions, to have scars. Among the given reasons, there is a long list of innumerable responses one will comply to the question, “Why don’t you love again?”

That’s all that they know. But they do not know anything about love. They do not understand what love really means.

Love. It is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, things in this world of chaos and uncertainty. It is not love that gives wound or the one that makes misery. Love is pure and clear though these words are synonymous. Love does not bring confusion. Love does not destroy you instead it makes you a better person.

It is ironic that many hate love. If you do not want to love anymore, then you do not really know what love is. It is so unfair that we blame anything to love. We, people, are the ones who stain it, who give love a bad name. love is the music of life, it is a God-given gift. To truly love is to understand it.

What is love?

To perfectly answer the question, I would like to quote Helen Steiner Rice’s poem “The Magic of Love”

Love is like magic
And it always will be.
For love still remains
Life’s sweet mystery!!
Love works in ways
That are wondrous and strange
And there’s nothing in life
That love cannot change!!
Love can transform
The most commonplace
Into beauty and splendor
And sweetness and grace.
Love is unselfish,
Understanding and kind,
For it sees with its heart
And not with its mind!!
Love is the answer
That everyone seeks…
Love is the language,
That every heart speaks.
Love can’t be bought,
It is priceless and free,
Love, like pure magic,
Is life’s sweet mystery!!

Other than this, it is not love you are feeling right now.

I have read a status update from a friend in Facebook. It says “Take my advice, because I do not take them anyway.” That line is great and fits me so I hit the “Like” button. But then, I felt that something is wrong with it, maybe there is something that lacks with it.

I can barely recall one of my friends saying that I am the “love doctor”. It’s funny to think that, after I have given advice to him about his problems. As a friend I always give such things instantly. All of them are optimistic in nature. Let me tell you why.

Love doctor. I just laughed when he said that. It seems like irony personifies me. Yes, the irony is too thick you can cut it with a knife. My love stories are a perfect plot for a tearjerker-movie.

I once cursed love. I can barely see how the butterflies in my chest turned into wasps that feasted my heart. There are times that I’m in heaven while there are times I’m in Earth. Yes, Earth, where happy-ever-after-endings never exist as one movie says. I do have won several times but they are all short-lived. I am a general who have lost in most of his battles. I am happy. I am sad. I am glad. I am angry. I feel great. I feel lost. It is enigmatic.

But then, I live everyday as if like nothing happened to me. I wear masks; I try to conceal any feeling. I am a great pretender since no one ever noticed what I’m going through. And now, I look positively when it comes to love. Like what I always keep on repeating to my friends: “You cannot blame love. It is just unfair to blame love. Love is, simply as it is, love.”

I won’t let my friends have my experiences. I don’t want them to endure the pain I once felt. I want them to feel what I have felt while I’m on the clouds. I want them to bear my smiles not my tears. I want them to be guided by the clear light not by the gloomy spark cast beneath the mist.

My advices serve as the embodiment of myself. It is me; I am sharing a part of me to my friends. Through that, they take me to their lives.

Back with my friend’s shout-out, I have established mine.

“Take my advice though I never had the chance to use them.”

STANZAS

Ryan Reyes

Jade porcelain is your beauty

Exquisite creation you are

Only your radiance

Never stops on shining

Help me, my princess

Am I falling so desperately?

Enlighten my blinded eyes

Rare goddess from up above

I am filled with awe by the sight

Miraculous, all is perfect

How I wish I can hold you

And touch your serene face

Joined are our hands

In a peaceful and warm night

Where nothing seems to interrupt

On this magic moment

Nothing but just a dream

Oh, I cannot forget that calm face of yours

Your radiant smile I could not resist

Though there are times the rain pours

Ardent adoration of mine will persist

You make me smile without any reason

And catch my breath every time I see you

Like I will be through any season

So vivid, so alive, so lively with every hue

I cannot describe what I am feeling

But I don’t care just as long as I’m glad

For this love that is so unceasing

So pure it can discern good and bad

They say “love is blind”. It may have eyes but they are shut closed and cannot see anything.

They say “love is blind.” And like the two-sided coin, we can really say that love is impaired of sight.

It is the power of love that makes two different people to find the path to choose. Love plays music in every hearts no matter what age, appearance, wealth, race, etc.

But love, as for others, does not pay attention to those who truly love, who always wait, who always sacrifice. You’ll hear how these bitter hearts curse Cupid for being not a sharpshooter. Love does not see those teary eyes and weary souls.

Maybe it is love that is not blind but we are. We’re just blinded either by passionate emotions or by dissatisfaction. By passionate feelings, I mean that because of the rush of intense emotions we are not able to weigh situations first. By dissatisfaction, I mean is the belief of someone that love does not exist at all.

Let us open our eyes if they were remained closed. How can we know what love is? By opening our eyes in enlightenment you’ll find love as a top peak but when you’re up there, the view is beautiful.

An interesting line from Will Moss I just want to share: “Love is not blind – It sees more and not less, but because it sees more it is willing to see less.”

Love may be blind, but it is not deaf. It hears you. You can hear it. Listen to your heart.

Are you tired of not being able to reach things? Do you wish to become taller? If so, you’re not alone. Fortunately, there are several legitimate ways to grow taller.

One of the most important things you can do in how to become tall is to treat your body well when it is still growing.

It is crucial that you get lots of exercise and maintain a good diet during this time. As you know, it is very important to consume enough vitamins and minerals. These aids in the growth process, as well as being important for other kinds of health. Depriving yourself of calcium, protein, amino acids, calories, and other nutrients can actually stunt your growth and lead to other health problems.

Additionally, failing to exercise can lead to being out of shape and overweight, which puts additional strain on your bones.

Exercising also releases height growth hormones, which aid in lengthening the cartilage growth plates on the ends of your longer bones. Jogging, swimming, yoga are all considered to be effective grow taller excercises. These simple excercises will not only make you tall but also increase your strength.

It is also very important to have enough sleep because when you sleep HGH is release into your bloodstream. This vital hormone regulates your body’s growth, show it is important to get enough rest for it to do its job. It is enough to sleep about 8 hours per day.

Don’t be fooled by companies that boast about exercises that will stretch your bones after you’ve hit puberty, though. Once your bones stop growing, nothing will make them grow again.

Of coarse, bad habits can also prevent you to grow, such as smoking, drinking to much beer and soft drinks, drug addiction, etc.

If you’re an adult and wish to learn how to become tall, there are many methods for you as well. Exercising and keeping your bones as healthy as possible may not lengthen your bones, but it will stop them from weakening and shrinking as you reach old age. In the meantime, regular exercise also keeps you trim and fit. Being slender, combined with height flattering clothing, can result in a convincing illusion that you’re much taller than you really are.

How does this work? Wearing solid colors blurs your waistline. Additionally, pinstripes produce a slimming effect and make you look taller. In contrast, wearing dark or patterned pants with a white shirt draws attention to your middle and makes you look shorter. Wearing bigger shoes, such as boots or clogs, can also help in making you look taller, as they make your feet look bigger. Even your hair has an effect on how tall you look-short hair makes your neck look longer, while longer hair makes your neck look shorter.

Valentine Shorties: Follow your heart.

Ever know why some say follow your heart in everything you do?

People in Aristotle’s time believed that the heart is the seat of intelligence, motion and sensation.

But what is in the heart that will make one to think that it’s been playing games on him. One can also find himself crying or regretting for following your heart. Then, there came the popular saying “Follow your brain not your heart.”

Literally, it means that the rush of emotions may blind us of knowing what is truly right for us this time. It is just that our feelings seem to overcome us making us believe on something that is not really there at all.

I think that the adage following your heart means following what your mind say. After all, anatomically speaking, our hearts do not decide but our brains do.

A great line I would like to share:

“Sometimes when almost everything is wrong, one thing is so right you would do it all again.”
– Alice Randall in Elle

Follow your heart.

Love is sweeter the second time around.

Love is like a cigar; you can light it again but will never taste quite the same.

Two differ in views about love. People differ views about love

That is the problem…

We, people, set standards in this world without even proving it.

But, love does not set standards.

A good example is the love of my aunt and uncle.

Once upon a time, there was a man who lived prosperous in a busy city. There was a poor lady who is happy inspite of the shortcomings she have in life. And that once-upon-a-time tale will grow to a happily-ever-after story…

My uncle, my mother’s younger brother, first met my aunt as their household helper. Being the most caring and sweet as she was, my aunt has the charm to make my uncle couldn’t help but to fall in love with her accidentally. Days and nights passed by and they both found their same ground. They fell in love with each other and it started a love story.

My aunt went back home to her province, far away from Manila, to finish her studies with my uncle to help with her expenses. The cold nights made my uncle longed for her warm arms. He could not resist it so there he flew to meet her again. Then, they came back and vowed their love to God.

A simple story that is so popular in television series, a perfect plot for unconditional love. A well-lived guy meets a simple woman. No one saw any flaws, any obstacles. And without the love between them, I won’t have two cousins to hang out with and a cute little princess to cuddle with.

Love has its own reason and that reason is unknown.

INSOMNIA



Restless nights now just have begun

Because of you, I cannot go to sleep

Though the whole world slumbers

My eyes are kept wide open



The sleepless nights seems to be countless

On every instant you cross to my mind

I’ve been counting all the stars and lambs

While the cool breeze whispers something



There are times of hugs and kisses

And moments you are in my embrace

But they are unreal, I am hopeless

Anticipating with every dream every night



I am resistant to the Sandman’s spell

Though moonlight spilled onto my face

Aphrodite has some other plans for me

I hope she’ll give you as my destiny



I long for the warmth of your bosom

As a shelter in the winter cold

I long for your sweet songs and lullabies

As the remedy of this insomnia



I’m not counting on what I’ve been dreaming

Though people say they might come true

Because I enjoy cherishing thoughts of you

For they are more lifelike than dreams